I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
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