You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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