drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
