i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Randomize
