Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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