My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
