is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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