I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
