No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
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