This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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