i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize