I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
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