just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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