The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
