think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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