i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize