and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
