I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize