He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
The power of my boobs compel you
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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