While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
