He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
