she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
