Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
