worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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