I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize