Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
