New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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