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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??

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• (714): View more from California

  found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??

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• (914): View more from New York

  explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?

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• (845): View more from New York

  i can't find my house

  (1-845): View more from New York

  we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.

  (845): View more from New York

  i'm pretty sure my house moved.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Why didn't I see you last night!?

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.

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