Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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