didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
