Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
