ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
You dont lie about slip and slides
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
