Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
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All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
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I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
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