Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
