idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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