Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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