Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!

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  (225): Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs! http://tfl.nu/87u7
  Replies (1) Good night (640) Bad night (1028)
• Favorite

  (409): View more from Texas

  Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.

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  (409): Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever. http://tfl.nu/fjfv
  Replies (12) Good night (917) Bad night (4122)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher

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  (612): the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher http://tfl.nu/eecw
  Replies (26) Good night (1018) Bad night (5185)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.

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  (214): bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink. http://tfl.nu/4c2j
  Replies (39) Good night (5633) Bad night (695)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.

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  (318): Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions. http://tfl.nu/wfb6
  Replies (15) Good night (3560) Bad night (764)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible

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  (408): I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible http://tfl.nu/my4k
  Replies (17) Good night (8414) Bad night (1257)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.

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  (845): You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake. http://tfl.nu/r8rw
  Replies (4) Good night (4911) Bad night (909)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.

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  (561): I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down. http://tfl.nu/sm69
  Replies (3) Good night (2271) Bad night (906)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.

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  (715): I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it. http://tfl.nu/u4wc
  Replies (15) Good night (3426) Bad night (837)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS

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  (630): I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS http://tfl.nu/zymg
  Replies (7) Good night (2375) Bad night (618)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.

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  (816): I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey. http://tfl.nu/ef3v
  Replies (3) Good night (1623) Bad night (540)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth

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  (412): I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth http://tfl.nu/07bl
  Replies (3) Good night (1474) Bad night (592)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.

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  (512): I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover. http://tfl.nu/wwf5
  Replies (14) Good night (1356) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..

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  (704): All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar.. http://tfl.nu/zfs2
  Replies (5) Good night (795) Bad night (307)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.

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  (954): All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me. http://tfl.nu/3tzi
  Replies (1) Good night (498) Bad night (272)

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