i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
