Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
so let's talk penis.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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