Are we in a gay sports bar?
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
