loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
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