R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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