Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
It's just like the Real World with babies
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
