Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize