i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
