you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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