the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
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If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
They took my balls.
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I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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