When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
You left your underwear on the fireplace
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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