I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize