I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Randomize
