One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize